For the benefit of those like me that don’t have a clue what day it is I looked it up and it’s Tuesday 7th April. 07:30 and I’m in the van heading to work and even better than that I’m going to the seaside, now before you get your knickers in a twist and start shouting “stay at home saves lives” I’m not on a jolly I’m delivering funeral flowers to Lenham then more in Broadstairs. It felt great driving for miles and miles in the sunshine and talk about small pleasures but seeing the sea was magical, I was seriously tempted to throw caution to the wind and go to the beach but I have one of those unlucky streaks that would undoubtedly mean I would get caught and carted off by the Po Po.
Flowers delivered I headed back but stopped at a fantastic farm shop and garden centre in Wingham. I nearly pissed my pants I was so excited, It was the best stocked place I’ve seen (pre Covid days as I’ve not set foot in a supermarket since lockdown) it was only 3 in the store at anytime so browsing wasn’t an option it had to be done Supermarket Sweep style, having been lucky enough to work at the studios when that was filmed I’d got a good insight on how to do it, I did panic and ended up purchasing random things as I sped around, throwing non essentials like chocolate cake, a tray of eggs, goose eggs, watercress, uncooked beetroot, bunched carrots, pots of herbs, veggie plants and 3 sacks of compost. Noticing more people waiting to come in I dashed to the the checkout to the woman dressed as a surgeon, she was a poor substitute for the late great Dale Winton, I didn’t know if she wanted to take my payment or perform an appendectomy on me!
I had planned on going straight home but had two calls on the journey back the First Lady begged for flowers to go to a charity aid worker who was having a melt down and desperately needed cheering up so I agreed to make a bouquet and deliver it then another lady called in pieces because her friends mother had died of Covid, I suggested a planted arrangement as flowers are few and far between. So yet more heart wrenching messages to write but it was a bit of a moment delivering them, people are normally happy to get flowers but these were beyond pleased it was like I’d delivered gold or loo roll! One complaint I had was the hand sanitizer at the charity office, it burned like bloody napalm!
Finally got back and dyed my hair, and my ears, and my neck, arms, a patch on stomach and leg and the bathroom and Gary’s precious Budweiser towel that’s older than our relationship (and yet in better condition) I have a bright red front to my hair again, the back is still black but now I have a two inch ultra red stripe up the middle because my roots were so grey they sucked up the dye and now glow. My home hairdressing is legendary, my son cries if I do his, as young as four he knew I was going to make him look a twat and screamed his protests. You would never tell I am descended from a long line of hairdressers and barbers but this gene seems to have skipped me.
The long suffering Giz redeemed himself for the previous days sleepathon by delivering funeral flowers to Hadlow, then got my Parents shopping, picked up a huge lump of venison from Dads “it moved so I shot it store” which is proving very handy, we usually have a family roast at Easter but we will eat this on behalf of those absent. He then came back and did what he does best (I don’t mean stink us out of the bathroom) he cut the grass and burnt the pile of brambles I cut out a few days ago. So boy done good (for once)
Food offering today were Corned beef and pickle sandwich for brunch, tea and biscuits for lunch and I made macaroni cheese for dinner but my rotten kids don’t eat that so had to make a separate pasta dish for them with a tomato sauce and a load of veggies. Gotta love a family that requires two meals cooked, I now understand how my poor mum must have felt having to cook four different meals for us, my brother was hyperactive so no additives (it was the 80’s everything had e numbers) also didn’t eat any cooked vegetables. I was a pain in the arse vegetarian, my dad was a meat and potatoes kind of man and mum was almost always on a diet, it was a mad house (sound familiar?)
Boris has been upgraded to intensive care, I wish him a speedy recovery because he is a human being with a family but not a speedy return to politics, I know there’s a load of people spouting “I stand with Boris” and even a “clap for Boris” campaign (which I suspect he’s already had 😉) but my memory isn’t that short we wouldn’t have an NHS for much longer if it was left to him and I hope he gets a better level of care than he thinks those people risking their lives are worth paying.
Went out to photograph the pink super moon I’m just not seeing the pink! It’s the first time I’ve had the camera out since our trip to Cornwall in February, it was good to be reunited with my beloved canon.
Once the boys had buggered off to bed Millie and I settled down to watch the 1989 classic, Warlock. Julian Sands sets my undies alight in that film but I’ve never forgiven him for atrocities like Arachnophobia!
It’s back on with mission shithole tomorrow so time for bed!
Life but not as we know it 